1. Gareth Snow addresses every outcome as it pertains to the specific work he is presenting, this is after initially listing out the formal outcomes for the class. In every section, Snow states what outcomes he is arguing for, then specifically addresses each one and an example of how his work meets that goal. The outcomes definitely weren’t integrated creatively, but Snow is extremely effective in showing his use of the outcomes rather than just telling the reader.

2. The portfolio provides several forms of evidence such as: a power point presentation, his other works not published on the portfolio, and links within the portfolio for prompts. These assist us in discovering the background to the portfolio since we were not present in the class.

3. Gareth’s use of logical appeal is abundant throughout his portfolio. Key rhetorical strategies are aimed more towards informing rather than persuading. He does not beg the question; links are available at every turn to back up his claims. He stays on target throughout his portfolio, without going off on tangents or getting carried away with rhetorical strategies. We believe his use of information is his most effective tactic in the portfolio, as it’s hard to dispute his claims when his evidence link is hovering ominously in the margin. Gareth addresses his audience in a very objective way, without skewing things or appealing to bias. He puts his claim on the table along with his evidence in a ‘take it or leave it’ mentality, which we find to be particularly effective. In instances like this, the audience is more inclined to accept his claim when he’s not attempting to force it upon them. Site design is basic but well organized; it gets the job done and is very user friendly.

4. Garreth’s writing style, especially in his conclusion, was really verbose and confusing. While this might appeal to an academic audience, it was difficult to read and understand. He could fix this by simply toning down his writing, using fewer big words, and generally simplifying things. Also, while his arguments for the claims were persuasive, by the time I had gotten to read them, I’d forgotten what they were, and thus they were not as effective. All he needs to do there is put his translation of the outcomes at the top of each paragraph or something like that. The last thing that really could use fixing was just the general organization of his site– sometimes he put the prompt on the page twice, sometimes he didn’t put up Jentery’s response to it, etc. He should have just put one of each thing in once, in the same place, and made sure each part was there every time.

5. From this portfolio, we learned that adding in your own personal tone can help to make the portfolio more personable. The way that Gareth writes is very direct and he tries to have a theme, but throughout his portfolio he fails to make the page interesting. So, in the service of our portfolios, we can add our own charcter and tone so that the reader wants to actually read it.

1. New Sound-Script:

This sound-script is primarily directed to my peers in 121B. Since the class is talking about voice-over and its importance, my claim deals with another aspect of voice-over and how it might more effectively engage the viewer of the movie. In this sound-script, I will focus on recording a voice-over for the same scene in A Mighty Heart with Angelina Jolie where her character is having to confront what happened to her beheaded husband before she gives birth to their child. I really felt that the voice-over’s style was effective, so I don’t want to drastically change the format, but rather include a greater emphasis on sound effects (like heavy breathing) in the cut. Minimal words will be said and instead of a narrative of what happened to her husband, I want to experiment with other sound effects that might also convey the message of the clip

2. Research Question:

How can the mere act of breathing engage the audience in a deeper manner rather than the use of words?

3. Claim:

The sound and visuals angles in a clip are both intertwined to create a harmony in the movie, but there are different types of voice-over which can be more effective in creating that unity in the clip. In a movie such as A Mighty Heart, the selected clip was intended to show the raw emotion of Jolie’s character. Just expressing her feelings verbally doesn’t convey that raw emotion in the way that short, heavy breaths do. So in some scenarios, sound effects can be more convincing than mere words. This is a risky claim because sound effects aren’t effective in every type of voice-over narration, so I need to clearly express the difference and give examples of correct and effective usage.

4. Importance of Claim and Sound-Script:

As stated in the first category, the class is studying the importance of voice-over narration, so my claim and sound-script present a different style of voice-over which further engages the idea of how voice-over might be important in the film industry.

5. Artifact:

I think the best artifact to use is Kozloff’s article, the “Introduction.” I am discussing the basics of voice-over in my claim and in order to do so I need to use the initial definitions presented to the class. This is a common ground which most of the class understands.

6. Questions about Claim:

– In what scenarios do sound effects create a negative effect towards a clip from a movie?

– Not a question, but I’m concerned about my ability to provide evidence to support my claim, and not be redundant in my paper.

“I am suggesting that reciprocal learning may be more possible if it is not tied to a notion of service.” – Cruz, “A Challenge to the Notion of Service”

Cruz, in her quote from the article she wrote, provides a valid point about people’s perspective of service.  A definition provided defines service “to process” which is very well understood from the quote.  Placed towards the end of the article, Cruz appears to be summarizing the major points, specifically that people can not learn from service learning if they incorporate the literal definition of the word and process the people they interact with  in the same way they’d process the orders in a restaurant.

Our narrator: a male voice because it holds more authority, plus the subjects of the doc were mostly male. Very serious and monotonous tone. A narrator that is distanced from the events – a simple observer, an interviewer.

Space and Time: It would sound as if the narrator was there – an interviewer. Would be present all scenes with commentary.

Content :  He isn’t speaking for anyone, if only the curious audience. He would have a conversation with the audience and bring up questions. He would summarize what people were trying to say and adding important context. Right after the residents of the amtrak : “The residents have voiced their resentment against the eviction, but the Amtrak office feels that they have reason to take that action” go to office.

Audience: We have decided that narrator is not serving anyone but instead is the eyes and ears for the audience, thus giving audience info and letting them do with it what they like.  It is easier for the audience to distance themselves emotionally. It allows people to still connect with the doc but still gives them space to hold their own position.

– The narrator of the first had a common voice for trailers. The video sounded like a movie about real life with a comedic twist. The narrator’s voice was mixed in with the characters’. A soundmark was used to portray the family setting.

The real life comedic twist was expressed through the keynote sound of background music. An acoustic visual of what the narrator was trying to get through to the audience was presented through a signal sound of typewriting and children playing in the background.

– The second video felt like a suspense, horror or science fiction piece. It excited anticipation and nervousness and portrayed intensity. It was signal sound.

So I never realized how much thought could be put into voice-over narration, but I guess someone could say the same thing about a bridge built by an engineer. In the first article, “Introduction”, there was an actual definition laid out for how to categorize a movie that has voice-over narration. In the second article, Kozloff goes into the argument between the importance of using or not using voice-over narration.

People might object to using voice-over narration for a few reasons. The main one is that if done a certain way, the movie condescends to the audience because it is directly telling the viewer what is occurring rather than showing it. Some directors feel that it is less artistic. Kozloff defends the use of voice-over narration because no one else rarely does and she feels that directors use the technique all the time without expressing their appreciation. To defend it, she defines the technique and then show how it made certain movies better.

I am actually not very familiar with voice-over narration, I feel like the person in her first article that recognizes what it is once it has been defined.  I realize when it’s been used but I don’t normally make an effort of analyzing the technique.  Initially, I was enthusiastic about using “Singing in the Rain” for my sequence one writing because it was a movie specifically about voice-over and the time period when it started being used, but after reading the articles I am having second thoughts.  I’m not exactly sure what I am going to do, I’ll see if “Singing in the Rain” could bring a different perspective to the paper rather than the stereotypical movies that students have done papers on.  We’ll see.